rawContent: @SpyHouston We can neither confirm nor deny this.

text: blaseball.boston

username: SpyHouston

displayname: Houston Spies


rawContent: be kind to yourself today 🦀🧡

renderedContent: be kind to yourself today 🦀🧡

username: BlaseballCrabs

displayname: The Baltimore Crabs 🦀👁 @ blaseball.com

rawDescription: "There's simply no finer team in @Blaseball than the Baltimore Crabs" — PC Gamer 🦀 6 Championship Wins 🦀 445M Years of Carcinization 🦀 Wabba Weeba, Claws Up!

location: The Crabitat, Baltimore, MD

text: blaseball.boston

source: Twitter Web App

sourceLabel: Twitter Web App


rawContent:
Liberal: *through sobs* you can't just say everything is Blaseball Vibes.... Please....
Me: *points at raccoon eating peanuts from a trash can* Blaseball Vibes

renderedDescription: "There's simply no finer team in @Blaseball than the Baltimore Crabs" — PC Gamer 🦀 6 Championship Wins 🦀 445M Years of Carcinization 🦀 Wabba Weeba, Claws Up!

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: filing a motion in sunbeams court to request that artists stop drawing Tillman hot because, my mind is telling me noo... but my body, MY BODYYY– https://t.co/1D8yvp8jSV

renderedContent: filing a motion in sunbeams court to request that artists stop drawing Tillman hot because, my mind is telling me noo... but my body, MY BODYYY– twitter.com/luins_/status/…

text: blaseball.boston

rawContent: tillman sketch #blaseball https://t.co/GUCchWje6m

displayname: Luin

rawDescription:
崙
animation student // @luindraws as well

location: comms open!

text: ko-fi.com/luinsart

source: Twitter for iPad

sourceLabel: Twitter for iPad


rawContent: @DSJisprettyOK Shh

renderedContent: @DSJisprettyOK Shh

text: blaseball.boston

source: Twitter for Android

sourceLabel: Twitter for Android

username: DSJisprettyOK

displayname: DSJ


rawContent:
So no-one told you life was gonna be this way
crab crab crab crab

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @KennedyLoser ngl it was p impressive

renderedContent: @KennedyLoser ngl it was p impressive

text: blaseball.boston

username: KennedyLoser


rawContent: crab crab crab crabcr cab crabcr acbcabrca rcab crab 🦀 cracb 🦀🦀

text: blaseball.boston

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: lol u went to college? riv student debt

renderedContent: lol u went to college? riv student debt

text: blaseball.boston

rawContent: I can’t believe I went to college for four years for a fucking business communication degree and now my job is to post shitty memes on what is basically some splorts dipshit’s stolen account to advertise a product no one even wants

rawDescription: Baltimore Crabs Ascended Team His/Him

renderedDescription: Baltimore Crabs Ascended Team His/Him

location: Baltimore, MD

text: blaseball.com

source: Twitter for iPhone

sourceLabel: Twitter for iPhone


rawContent: goobie ballson you sunavagun you've done it again!!! https://t.co/FPfUPBEf07

renderedContent: goobie ballson you sunavagun you've done it again!!! twitter.com/BlallIsLife/st…

text: blaseball.boston

text: twitter.com/BlallIsLife/st…

rawContent: remember, if crab crab crab crabcr cab crabcr acbcabrca rcab crab 🦀 cracb 🦀 🦀 were just a reminder that it means you can watch me whip

username: BlallIsLife

displayname: goobie ballson

rawDescription: blall is life and life is short ✌🏻 art by @hetreasky

source: GoobieBallson

sourceLabel: GoobieBallson


rawContent: Carcinization is just all-natural Bimboification

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: fuck winter

renderedContent: fuck winter

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: Tok Fox https://t.co/vP8nZkJcAw

renderedContent: Tok Fox https://t.co/vP8nZkJcAw

text: blaseball.boston

contentType: application/x-mpegURL

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: Yeeting myself into the black hole, every atom of my body stretched paper thin as I die a slow and agonizing unending death - Try the Newest Tik Tok Sensation, the Black Hole Challenge! 🎵🌌

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: hot dads love da Crabs. many dad bods spotted around the Crabitat. Moms too? Aw you betcha, hot parents all round. but it's the dads that steal the show. the upper decks flooded with bod. strong fathers roam freely. and on the field, Kennedy Loser, the boddest dad of all!

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @Kabanaw this rules

renderedContent: @Kabanaw this rules

text: blaseball.boston

username: Kabanaw

displayname: Kabanaw


rawContent: @catacalypto @tacoblaseball @LoversBlaseball @LupineAlpha @Sargent @hifridays i live in baltimore, please dont look up my IP address to confirm

text: blaseball.boston

username: catacalypto

displayname: Cat Manning

username: tacoblaseball

displayname: LA Unlimited Tacos

username: LoversBlaseball

displayname: San Francisco Lovers, Sponsored by Nap Time

username: LupineAlpha

displayname: Leuchocolgy Lichen (Plant City Plecos Founder)

username: Sargent

displayname: Stephen Granade

username: hifridays

displayname: Hawaiʻi Fridays


rawContent: @blaseball Don't worry Parker - if they try to incinerate you, they'll have to incinerate at least 6 or 7 of us first! Then you. 7 is our upper limit.

text: blaseball.boston

username: blaseball

displayname: BLASEBALL COMMISSIONER


rawContent: @tacoblaseball @LoversBlaseball @LupineAlpha @catacalypto @Sargent @hifridays i listened to a podcast and somebody described ox tongue tacos and now it's all I can think about I want it so bad :(

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @Boraedu Rest in Biolence

renderedContent: @Boraedu Rest in Biolence

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @LoversBlaseball @LupineAlpha @catacalypto @Sargent @hifridays @tacoblaseball crabs dont have hearts biologically

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @Boraedu BIL

renderedContent: @Boraedu BIL

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: SKU 937 - Sexy Capitalist Coin Leader Costume - [XXS-3XXL] - RRP $59.99 - Desc: "Perfect for your Daleween celebration, this Sexy Capitalist Coin Leader Costume includes an all silver ensemble, blindfold and scales of justice. Introduce Fair Play at your next costume party!"

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent:
THE BIG ANCIENT CRAB: in the time before words, my subjects sacrificed themselves en masse in the pursuit of Carcinization. What do you do for the cause?
ME: i post tweets
THE BIG ANCIENT CRAB:
ME: um they're rly good tweets :)

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @SkunksVenus good luck rival skunks! 🌎🦀❤

text: blaseball.boston

username: SkunksVenus

displayname: venus skunks 🦨


rawContent: @SkunksVenus https://t.co/Z5iq9XCSdI

renderedContent: @SkunksVenus https://t.co/Z5iq9XCSdI

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: sitting in a giant pot of hot water. pure relaxation. Is the water getting slowly hotter? I wouldn't know, I'm listening to Phoebe Bridgers on my noise cancelling waterproof ear buds w/ my eyes closed as the sous chef adds more bath salt

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @StrikeFourth this is relevant to my interests

text: blaseball.boston

username: StrikeFourth

displayname: Fourth Strike


rawContent:
New Alliance formed with the Detroit Octopods

New Rivalry formed with the Venus Skunks

text: blaseball.boston

rawContent:
This AI has never heard of #Blaseball but when I gave it the list of existing teams, GPT-3 predicted that these teams will come next.
https://t.co/eSivV01dBV https://t.co/4uCMNBok6v

renderedContent:
This AI has never heard of #Blaseball but when I gave it the list of existing teams, GPT-3 predicted that these teams will come next.
aiweirdness.com/post/633411394… https://t.co/4uCMNBok6v

username: JanelleCShane

displayname: Janelle Shane

rawDescription: I write https://t.co/WNB8L0jc17. My book "You Look Like a Thing and I Love You" is out now! Research Scientist in optics. she/her. https://t.co/cC9JEun7YH

renderedDescription: I write aiweirdness.com. My book "You Look Like a Thing and I Love You" is out now! Research Scientist in optics. she/her. wandering.shop/@janellecshane

text: aiweirdness.com

text: wandering.shop/@janellecshane

location: Boulder, CO

text: janelleshane.com


rawContent: coming out to my parents as a fan of a Baltimore splorts team. My dad silently weeps. My other dad looks away and asks "where did we go wrong?"

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: "my team is the gayest team" I yell into a Discord full of exclusively queer progressive leftists, every 6 hours every day until the siesta slowmode ends

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @WSHUBlaseball @CHSSTFans @blaseball @SIBROfficial @blaseball_pod crabs win GG good bye :)

text: blaseball.boston

username: WSHUBlaseball

displayname: WSHU: The Voice of the Charleston Shoe Thieves

username: CHSSTFans

displayname: 👟 Charleston Shoe Thieves 👟

username: SIBROfficial

displayname: Society for Internet Blaseball Research 🔮

displayname: Take Me Out To The Blall Game


rawContent:
@VerbingNouns simile and the whole world smilies with you
crab and you crab alone

username: BlaseballCrabs

displayname: The Baltimore Crabs 🦀👁 @ blaseball.com

text: blaseball.boston

username: VerbingNouns

displayname: Lauren ''Dark Verbs are 85% of Language'' Ackerman


rawContent: Are the Crabs a metaphor? Well, Yes and No...

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @bellart03 @blaseball can we get a close up of the boss for valid artistic purposes? 🥺

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent:
The waterboy looks down on him,
As he picks up the ball
It's another awful day
It's another awful day
It's another awful day
It's another awful day
It's another awful day
It's another awful day
It's another awful day
It's another awful day
It's another awful day
It's another awfu

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @RFoluler it's sunbeams court, the more prep you do the more likely you are to be incinerated

text: blaseball.boston

username: RFoluler

displayname: Rhett Foluler


rawContent: imagine if Baby Yoda from The Mandalorian was a crab. Ha ha! The Mandalorian would be like "im The Mandalorian" and craby yoda could be like "wabba weeba, claws up!". This is content.

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @catacalypto @Wanderlustin thankyou Cat, appreciate the kind words! 🦀❤

text: blaseball.boston

displayname: Cat Manning

username: Wanderlustin

displayname: safter chief (ساف) 🦀 🔥


rawContent: "The Crabs are brash, confident, numerous, jovial, scheming and - for most of their history - very good at blaseball." — and humble. incredibly attractive and humble.

text: blaseball.boston

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent:
CLAWS UP BAYBEE

link to quiz > https://t.co/tiJsavAzNN https://t.co/ssGhVr1e2Q

renderedContent:
CLAWS UP BAYBEE

link to quiz > tsawac.itch.io/blaseball-team… https://t.co/ssGhVr1e2Q

text: blaseball.boston

text: tsawac.itch.io/blaseball-team…

rawContent:
Bored in the Siesta? Crave external validation for your deeply personal choices? New to blaseball and horribly confused?

We made a quiz to help determine what #blaseball team is right for you.

https://t.co/2iFNRqdYGN

renderedContent:
Bored in the Siesta? Crave external validation for your deeply personal choices? New to blaseball and horribly confused?

We made a quiz to help determine what #blaseball team is right for you.

tsawac.itch.io/blaseball-team…

username: tsawac

displayname: Sam Kabo Ashwell 🎸

rawDescription: Interactive fiction, storygame RPGs, crit of same; third-culture, filthy leftism, futile overthinking. Apparently just a blaseball account now. He/him.

location: Honolulu, HI

text: heterogenoustasks.wordpress.com

source: TweetDeck

sourceLabel: TweetDeck

text: tsawac.itch.io/blaseball-team…

title: The Blaseball Team Affinity Quiz by Sam Kabo Ashwell

description: Play in your browser

username: itchio

rawDescription:
Open indie game marketplace and DIY game jam host

Account support? Email support@itch.io

location: San Francisco

text: itch.io

text: heterogenoustasks.wordpress.com


rawContent:
MY IMAGINARY GIRLFRIEND: it's too late. I am in control now. You imagined me too powerful. I cannot be stopped. I cannot be contained. I am in the driver's seat, you are merely a passenger
ME: oh nice!
IMAGINARY GIRLFRIEND: it's not a good thing, your fantasy has-
ME: bye bye ✌

text: blaseball.boston

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent:
MY BEAUTIFUL GIRLFRIEND, RECOVERING: if it's just text on a tweet without an image or video, why not just pretend it happened instead of actually doing it?
ME: that's a suspiciously self-aware thought for someone who doesn't exist 🤔

text: blaseball.boston

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent:
ME: trust me this will get a lot of likes when I tweet about it later
MY GIRLFRIEND, COVERED IN 30+ LIVE WRITHING CRABS, ALSO THE CRABS ARE ON FIRE AND DIDN'T PAY THEIR TAXES: owee!

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: our bad the Mills asked to borrow the Discourse Cage https://t.co/HQ2pjlRATr

renderedContent: our bad the Mills asked to borrow the Discourse Cage twitter.com/NYMag/status/1…

text: blaseball.boston

rawContent: In one of the surest signs of an impending apocalypse we have yet seen, a New York City man fell about 15 feet into a pit of rats when a sidewalk sinkhole opened under his feet https://t.co/pnxYTi7h4Z

renderedContent: In one of the surest signs of an impending apocalypse we have yet seen, a New York City man fell about 15 feet into a pit of rats when a sidewalk sinkhole opened under his feet nym.ag/2HJLFaU

username: NYMag

displayname: New York Magazine

rawDescription:
The ideas, people, and cultural currents that are forever reshaping the world.
Subscribe: https://t.co/eO5NQ0hSUF
Get One Great Story: https://t.co/FtV7tlY7aX

renderedDescription:
The ideas, people, and cultural currents that are forever reshaping the world.
Subscribe: nymag.com/subscribe
Get One Great Story: nym.ag/3tRlORP

text: nymag.com/subscribe

location: New York, NY

text: nymag.com

description: Official

source: SocialFlow

sourceLabel: SocialFlow

title: And Now, a Sinkhole Full of Rats

description: A New York sidewalk split and swallowed its victim, plunging him into a rat pit.

username: TheCut

displayname: The Cut

rawDescription:
Style. Self. Culture. Power.
Find us on Instagram: @TheCut
Subscribe to New York for more: https://t.co/1OtjTJftYM

renderedDescription:
Style. Self. Culture. Power.
Find us on Instagram: @TheCut
Subscribe to New York for more: nymag.com/subscribe

text: nymag.com/subscribe

description: Official

displayname: Claire Lampen

rawDescription: staff writer @nymag's @thecut | words @gothamist @voguemagazine @GQMagazine etc. | unfortunately i cannot approve story pitches

location: Brooklyn

text: thecut.com/author/claire-…

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent:
INTERVIEWER: can you explain this gap on your resume from 2020 to 2021 where it just says "Crab Things"?
ME, SMILING WISTFULLY: No

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @EonsShow because it's the optimal form to play Blaseball.

text: blaseball.boston

username: EonsShow

displayname: Eons


rawContent: When there is a disagreement over fan canon for a Blaseball character, all participants are lowered into the Discourse Cage and must fight to the death. And at the end of it all, the lone survivor is quietly pushed into a well

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @lrphilipson Never.

renderedContent: @lrphilipson Never.

text: blaseball.boston

username: lrphilipson

displayname: Liam Philipson (parody)


rawContent:
@NagomiMcdaniel Ah, so you discuss me?
We run a trust fund baybee you can trust me

text: blaseball.boston

username: NagomiMcdaniel

displayname: NAGOMI MCDANIEL


rawContent: Baltimore, you great unfinished symphony, you sent for we

text: blaseball.boston

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @BlaseballOOC Only the Discourser, master of all 3 canons could stop him. But when the splort needed them most, they vanished

text: blaseball.boston

username: BlaseballOOC

displayname: Blaseball Out of Context


rawContent:
I imagine crab so much it feels more like a memory
Is this where it gets me? On my feet, several crabs ahead of me?
I see it scuttlin, do I run or call an ump or do I let it be?
there is no Bay, no NaGoMi

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @BlaseballMatt idk but it sounds Provocative!

text: blaseball.boston

username: BlaseballMatt

displayname: Blaseball Matt


rawContent: Rogue is a blaseball-like

renderedContent: Rogue is a blaseball-like

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent:
"Crabs lost 98-1 Big League"
No.
Crabs lost most games in S1. What did we do? We didn't cry, we rallied. We scuttled. We voted, en masse. And we never stopped until we won 3 Championships + Ascended

We won 1 Big league game. We drew blood, once. Let's do it again 🩸

Claws Up!

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @FlangraphsBlase Your lack of faith of disturbing. We are the only known IBL team to win a game on the Big Leagues. We should be celebrating, nonstop, pouring our heart and love and resources into winning 2 or more games next season!!! This is the Crabs way

text: blaseball.boston

username: BFFBlaseball


rawContent: RIV to those stuck in the past, unable to escape, trapped by their own failures, reliving them over and over and over. if it's any consolation if we still had Tillman your loss would have been more embarrassing as he checked his phone during ascension 😢

text: blaseball.boston

rawContent: @CHSSTFans, have you ever lied awake in bed wondering what a Season 9, flinch-less, fourth-base-less, mild-less, @tillmanrules-less Charleston team would have looked like against the Season 10 @BlaseballCrabs? We know WE have.

username: WSHUBlaseball

displayname: WSHU: The Voice of the Charleston Shoe Thieves

rawDescription: WSHU airs on https://t.co/5mod01hjeo. #Blaseball #CharlestonShoeThieves. Xennial-run account for most ages. Not affiliated with @Blaseball.

renderedDescription: WSHU airs on twitch.tv/blaseballwshu. #Blaseball #CharlestonShoeThieves. Xennial-run account for most ages. Not affiliated with @Blaseball.

text: twitch.tv/blaseballwshu

location: Charleston

text: wshu.live

displayname: 👟 Charleston Shoe Thieves 👟

username: tillmanrules

displayname: Tillman Henderson 69th inductee to the Hall o Fame


rawContent: @wallofmomsden @chewstooloud we'll be back ❤❤❤

displayname: The Baltimore Crabs 🦀👁 @ blaseball.com

text: blaseball.boston

username: wallofmomsden

displayname: WoM•DENVER


rawContent: @HilfordG crab good

renderedContent: @HilfordG crab good

username: BlaseballCrabs

text: blaseball.boston

username: HilfordG

displayname: 𝘼𝘾𝘼𝘽alenciaga Girl


text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: Everything reminds me of them... 😭 https://t.co/G36gFTZebs

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent:
"stuck around but my team in a different league
i may be a thief but i rep LLC"
https://t.co/sJ33elNRmW

renderedContent:
"stuck around but my team in a different league
i may be a thief but i rep LLC"
soundcloud.com/yung_tilly_tha…

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @Azujax eating myself to regain health and thus live forever 🧠📈

text: blaseball.boston

username: Azujax

displayname: Edania L.


rawContent: The history of Baltimore is also the history of Clawlamity Crabon

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @MarioPrime Too late, ascension has been cancelled. Only Crabs go to heaven (and can never leave 😬)

text: blaseball.boston

username: MarioPrime

displayname: Giovanni Colantonio


rawContent: I fail to see the problem here.

renderedContent: I fail to see the problem here.

text: blaseball.boston

rawContent: HELP ME. SOMEONE MAILED ME A FULL MAGIC THE GATHERING CRAB DECK, FEATURING EVERY SINGLE CRAB CARD IN THE GAME. WHY. https://t.co/rrTjy3kuoR

rawDescription: Gaming Section Lead @digitaltrends | Prev: @inversedotcom, Speedrun by @Polygon | Casts: @LTRTcast @WeekInBlaseball | I'm literally Kate Bush. | He/Him

location: Brooklyn, NY

text: duckspeak.bandcamp.com


rawContent: @Azujax love it

renderedContent: @Azujax love it

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @BlaseballNews @facelessywoman @HadesBlaseball BNN is doing a retroactively good job???

text: blaseball.boston

username: BlaseballNews

displayname: BLASEBALL NEWS NETWORK

username: facelessywoman

displayname: Chloe 🦇🧡🖤💜 💕❤💖

username: HadesBlaseball

displayname: Hades Tigers Official Fan Club


rawContent: @BlaseballNews @HadesBlaseball spoiler: we won

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: Despite not winning any blessings, the Crabs just received their Arcana card https://t.co/oCsGHYKIkz

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: Blaseball being on break doesn't bother me. I will simply engage with one of my many other fulfilling hobbies. ahh yes, mmmm, love to be a well-rounded person with many engaging and fulfilling hobbies. Each hobby more engaging and fulfilling than the last!

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @trail_juniper haha, you got them good

renderedContent: @trail_juniper haha, you got them good

text: blaseball.boston

displayname: Waltzin Murr~ 🔞


rawContent: @winterion uh oh spaghetti-o

renderedContent: @winterion uh oh spaghetti-o

text: blaseball.boston

username: winterion

displayname: Daniel Greenberg


rawContent: @stutrololol that 2nd tweet is parody, we are actually very angy and considering litigation in a Time Trial with Chrono-Lawyers and a Clock Judge or some shit idk

text: blaseball.boston

username: stutrololol

displayname: stu trololol 👌💕💯🎈


rawContent: yet another season of blaseball where the crabs won zero blessings. this is bullshit!

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @stutrololol We posted it, you just shared a screenshot. Please ask permission before sharing screenshots of our future tweets.

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: How it StartedHow its going https://t.co/5PtKAuG7bV

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: Wow, there was water on the Moon that Tot Fox killed, RIV

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: It is NOT a "pyramid scheme". It's a reverse trapezoid, it says right there in the name. Trapezoids are not Pyramids, trust me, my ex-girlfriend was an Egyptian tour guide who was super into geometry

text: blaseball.boston

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: I used to be a collection of snippy fans who were angry because they were broke and their team sucked. Now I'm a collection of successful business crabs winning game in the Big Leagues. How did we do this? We utilized CEO Harmony H. Henderson's Reverse Trapezoid of Profitability

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: We send a the team into space!! We don't pay a the taxes!! Ohhh!!

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: 🤑 https://t.co/5GSpqyvBa5

renderedContent: 🤑 https://t.co/5GSpqyvBa5

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @BlaseballNews @blaseball hey that's me

renderedContent: @BlaseballNews @blaseball hey that's me

text: blaseball.boston

username: blaseball

displayname: BLASEBALL COMMISSIONER


rawContent:
At the $10 tier you get to add a name to the pool of names used for new players

At the $20 tier you get to join a Q&A with the devs to ask questions

We have just 2k to go until we hit the next goal - Expansion Teams! Exciting! It would be cool to hit this goal during the break! https://t.co/GnknodsjET

text: blaseball.boston

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent:
Do you enjoy @blaseball? Do you have disposable income?

The devs @thegameband have a Patreon. It's one of the few ways Blaseball is funded. The game still isn't profitable and costs money to develop and run

If you can afford it, please subscribe here: https://t.co/bJYuq8pUT8

renderedContent:
Do you enjoy @blaseball? Do you have disposable income?

The devs @thegameband have a Patreon. It's one of the few ways Blaseball is funded. The game still isn't profitable and costs money to develop and run

If you can afford it, please subscribe here: patreon.com/blaseball

text: blaseball.boston

text: patreon.com/blaseball

username: thegameband

displayname: The Game Band


rawContent: @blaseball Is the Boss gonna show up? I mean it's totally fine if not, just curious in a very normal way

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: In England, instead of two gay cowpeople falling in love and retiring to a Ranch, they retire to a Cool Original

text: blaseball.boston

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: get a ranch, jeez https://t.co/bs3OS5UDU0

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @hmouthsunbeams Nice-ish

renderedContent: @hmouthsunbeams Nice-ish

text: blaseball.boston

username: hmouthsunbeams

displayname: Hellmouth Sunbeams


rawContent: Congratulations to the Crabs on being the first and only team to ever ascend, having slammed the door shut behind us 🏆🏆🏆 https://t.co/kESOZBdCJX

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent:
📉: Simping for the Boss
📈: Simping for my new Landlord, The Boss 😍🏟

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @blaseball We are excited to work with CEO Parker on this exciting property development. Truly a new era of Peace and Profitability for the League!

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: HOLD

renderedContent: HOLD

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @eatingsrptchkds @SIBROfficial Yes, we sell those! Your order has been placed.

text: blaseball.boston

username: tlmberhearth

username: SIBROfficial

displayname: Society for Internet Blaseball Research 🔮


rawContent: @SIBROfficial : )

renderedContent: @SIBROfficial : )

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: The Defence Manifests. https://t.co/Vh68uDUS5N

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: is it her phome nummber?? 🥺🙏 https://t.co/rBxtUyT1Mf

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: ...Kiss! The Forbidden Book...

renderedContent: ...Kiss! The Forbidden Book...

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @HOU_SPI_RAD_TRA We did a hex so that when an IRS agent attempts to read are tweets they all say "We love to pay taxes"

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: Each December people gather across The Immaterial Plane to celebrate Crabmas, a magical time of year where Father Crabmas or 'Santa Claws' delivers live writhing good crabs to all the good children, and somewhat angrier bad crabs to the bad children 🎅🦀

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @HOU_SPI_RAD_TRA we're a C Corp, LLC is just our name to confuse the IRS

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: remember the lawful evil division? this is them now https://t.co/xOM3NpEr5O

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent:
he was a crab
she was a coin
can I make it any more obvious?

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: 🥺😩 yyes Boss 🙏🙏

renderedContent: 🥺😩 yyes Boss 🙏🙏

text: blaseball.boston

rawContent: We feel appreciated and validated. Thank you, Boss. https://t.co/uoypEBJJn8

rawDescription:
The Blaseball news you need, from Blaseball fans like you!

Join our Discord: https://t.co/OUXUSSt3wD

Contact us: editor@blaseball.news

renderedDescription:
The Blaseball news you need, from Blaseball fans like you!

Join our Discord: tinyurl.com/beancord

Contact us: editor@blaseball.news

text: tinyurl.com/beancord

location: who's asking

text: BLASEBALL.NEWS


rawContent: "Tillman Henderson has been encouraged to stay, please stay."

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @blaseball @wherecardsfall Ready for Sun 3 🌞

text: blaseball.boston

username: wherecardsfall

displayname: Where Cards Fall


rawContent: I can't believe the Crabs have done this.....

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: Miss you babes 🥺

renderedContent: Miss you babes 🥺

text: blaseball.boston

rawContent: remember the lawful evil division? this is them now. https://t.co/e9eL8vALvI

username: jesstelephone

displayname: Jessica Telephone

rawDescription: wrong number || pfp is from @crikadelic

renderedDescription: wrong number || pfp is from @crikadelic

text: blaseball.com


rawContent: Congratulations to the Hades Tigers for not having to figure out what ascension means for your community for at least another 3 weeks! 🐅🎉

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: Okay, Beams beat Tigers, honestly GG - great team, great season, great playoffs. First Final too I think? But now channeling all of our excess productivity to ex-Crab Oliver Notarobot and the Seattle Garages! You can do it 🎸📈

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: lol

renderedContent: lol

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @BlaseballTimes With these scores? : ))) https://t.co/o6ZE8kWRpj

text: blaseball.boston

username: BlaseballTimes


rawContent: Game 6 of the Best-of-5. Welcome to Blaseball y'all. Game 7 gonna be lit! https://t.co/f7WT8ynYDl

username: BlaseballCrabs

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @ch4zm_of_hell you didn't see how fuckin ripped that lamp was.....

text: blaseball.boston

displayname: 🌞 Ch4zm of Hellmouth 🌞


rawContent: @joel_a_clark we don't play games that can be spectated any more, joel. the sheer energy must be channeled somewhere...

displayname: The Baltimore Crabs 🦀👁 @ blaseball.com

text: blaseball.boston

displayname: joel a clark


rawContent: @joel_a_clark implying I can't shitpost during games. ludicrous!

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: The Tigerbeams games are going so long because fans of both teams keep stopping to makeout in the stands, the field, the dugout. We get it y'all, just hit 10 runs and win.....

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent:
THE GAME BAND: we're moving the quarter-finals to Friday so Saturday stuff doesn't finish so late
THE GAME BAND LATER: oh no

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @breakingcreech The Players are the Product. Their survival is paramount to our operations. Our research indicates dead players generate up to 78% less revenue on average.

text: blaseball.boston

username: breakingcreech

displayname: Ben


rawContent: We are losing all of our games in the Big Leagues because our players are finally resting. They truly don't give a shit any more. We won that 1 game because a Nagomi Homerun managed to fly all the way from Hawai'i to here and bean the other Pitcher out cold (still recovering)

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: Our plan to ascend in S10, clearing the way for a S11 Tigerbeams semi-final where the Black Hole activates over and over again, swallowing wins and leading to an infinity series with infinite bets and infinite Profit potential has worked perfectly

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: Small acts of kindness are allowed, in the pursuit of profit. If in doubt, consult a Line Manager about your team's monthly Empathy Allowance. 📈

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @stutrololol wow

renderedContent: @stutrololol wow

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @stutrololol We respect your Fair Use defense in this objectively humorous parody (tests came back positive), but we object to your use of the F word in general. We prefer 'Equitable.'

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @TTigercubs We do not engage in "kidnapping" or any other crimes. Occasionally we may make a Hostile Acquisition in broad daylight, but we assure you we filed the correct paperwork!

text: blaseball.boston

username: TTigercubs

displayname: aloe vera 🐅🎸


rawContent: @glassgoblin @2tot2fox Senior Eclipse Expert Tot "Sunkiller" Fox

text: blaseball.boston

username: glassgoblin

displayname: gob! 🍋

displayname: Tot Fox


rawContent: @stutrololol Where did you get this? This is not an approved tweet from our Branding Enforcement division???

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: Blaseball isn't a video game, it's a business experiment designed to see what happens when a team of game developers maximize Productivity by working every weekend for the rest of their lives. 📈

text: blaseball.boston

rawContent: Blaseball isn't a video game, it's a social experiment designed to see what happens when a team of game developers have all of their weekends ruined for the rest of their lives

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @blaseball Never before in the history of Blaseball has a CEO Commissioner been able to run 2 sets of games simultaneously. This is a revolutionary improvement that will 2X productivity across the splort! CEO Parker is doing an outstanding job!

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: Crab™ LLC needs a friend, it's lonely in this Productivity Cage. Let the Tigers ascend to glory! 🐅📈

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: Crab™ LLC completely denies any involvement with the ongoing Charleston Crisis. So-called "proven links" between us and local Shoeloss Prevention groups are unfounded, and leaking any info would break your Non-Disclosure Agreement if such an agreement exists (it doesn't) 📈

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @VerbFeld Our preliminary research indicates that consumers are extremely ignorant and don't really care about that.

text: blaseball.boston

username: VerbFeld

displayname: Verbosity Feldspar, Hotshot Reporter


rawContent: @VerbFeld A quick cost-benefit analysis reveals that the goodwill generated by a transparent "AMA" is far outweighed by the risks of being asked a question that we don't want to answer. But will certainly pass this suggestion on to our Suggestions / Incinerator Department!

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @VerbFeld we already completed our Annual Meritocracy Assessment. The results were... wanting.

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: Thank you all so much for 4000+ followers! We will do our best to capitalize on this in the most unethical ways possible 🤗📈

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: On a positive note, thanks to the Black Hole weather effect post-season games can go indefinitely now. Looking forward to Game 10 of the Final finishing at 2AM EST, a Profitable hour for the Work. ⚫📈

text: blaseball.boston

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: Disappointing that the Quarter Finals of the post-season have been moved to Friday, giving fans & players more time to rest and recuperate. Productivity could be maximised if games never ended, never ended, a game every hour every day until Sun 2 supernovas and swallows us all 📈

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: Oh word, the Profits are Sky-High!!! Invest Now. 📈 https://t.co/9CWzpkvO1K

text: blaseball.boston

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: Rumors of workers rights protests are unfounded. If you think you see or hear a protest, head to Values Realignment for a free Birthday Cake. The Line must NOT go down, only Up! 📈

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @blaseball We welcome the Tigers to acquisition... sorry, ascension. Claws Up (because Tigers have claws) 🐅📈

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: This "Spicy Meme" was approved by our Department of Persuasive Images. Laughter is mandatory. 📈 https://t.co/afS0YTn5jl

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: Come up to 99 and find out.

renderedContent: Come up to 99 and find out.

text: blaseball.boston

rawContent: they can't stop Us

renderedContent: they can't stop Us

username: CrabsLLCUnion

displayname: Crabs LLC Union

rawDescription: Workers' union @BlaseballCrabs. Claws up for workers' rights!

location: Immaterial Plane


rawContent: We apologize for this Unprofessional tweet. The situation is being rectified. Being "horny on main" is not Profitable. 📉

text: blaseball.boston

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: Is the Boss single or..... no reason at all just curious haha 🥺

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @Imadabatman We're Pivoting.

renderedContent: @Imadabatman We're Pivoting.

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @Corvak Charitable contributions are important in earning goodwill so you can better capitalize, and also offer great tax benefits! We absolutely support Blaseball Cares whether it takes place on Sunday, New Thursday or some other day.

text: blaseball.boston

username: Corvak

displayname: Corvak


rawContent: As per the office-wide memo, we have replaced Thursday with 2nd Monday to increase productivity. Old Sunday is now New Thursday. If you're having trouble understanding don't worry, just stop thinking and get back to work. https://t.co/MDVaGQCnAC

renderedContent: As per the office-wide memo, we have replaced Thursday with 2nd Monday to increase productivity. Old Sunday is now New Thursday. If you're having trouble understanding don't worry, just stop thinking and get back to work. twitter.com/MZerovii/statu…

text: blaseball.boston

text: twitter.com/MZerovii/statu…

rawContent: @BlaseballCrabs but its thursday

renderedContent: @BlaseballCrabs but its thursday

displayname: Zerovii

rawDescription:
Twitch affiliate, gamer, depressed. He/him
Inquiry email available on request

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: Monday Motivation! Profits Up 😤💪📈 https://t.co/Qws37zuk5E

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: Wow, the Boss gave the Blaseball community a small amount of precious metal at no cost AND delivered free and fast? This is why She's in charge! 🪙📈

text: blaseball.boston

username: NYMSplortscast

displayname: Your New York Millennials Splortscaster

rawDescription: (Unofficial) Full-time Splortscasterfor the NY Millenials. Part-Time CMA (Cursed Media Agent). ~The Youth Will Save Us~  He/Him

location: Blong Island

text: twitch.tv/nymsplortscast


rawContent: CEO Parker Macmillan III has overseen the greatest growth period @blaseball has ever seen. Under his leadership, the Rogue Umpires were reigned in, the blooddrain stopped gurgling and teams reap the benefits of partying. We stand by the CEO, and look forward to a Profitable Q4 📈

rawDescription: "There's simply no finer team in @Blaseball than the Baltimore Crabs" — PC Gamer 🦀 6 Championship Wins 🦀 445M Years of Carcinization 🦀 Wabba Weeba, Claws Up!

text: blaseball.boston

displayname: BLASEBALL COMMISSIONER


rawContent: @3amepiphany Innovative.

renderedContent: @3amepiphany Innovative.

text: blaseball.boston

displayname: ☆ cat plinko ☆ Chet AwesomeLaser 🐀


rawContent: @blaseball A classic short strategy. Race to party time, reap the benefits then sweep back into the playoffs. A Profitable move from the new team! 📈

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: Synergy.

renderedContent: Synergy.

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: Employees are encouraged to report un-Profitable behavior to People Ops. Failure to report will result in consequences. Failing to report a failure to report will result in consequences. This nests infinitely - it's consequences all the way down. 📉

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @ManishEarth We're headquartered in Baltimore because that's where the crab stack began.

text: blaseball.boston

username: ManishEarth

displayname: Manish


rawContent: There are many ways you can be a good Crab™ LLC employee. You can practice our core values. You can put this job ahead of your boring family & friends. But most of all, as long as every action you take makes the Line go Up, you will be A Really Good Crab™ employee. 📧📈

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @BfWinkler @blaseball Absolutely, head to New Hire Ingest (Player From Inferior Teams Division). Tell them HHH sent you.

text: blaseball.boston

username: BfWinkler

displayname: Nic Winkler

username: blaseball


rawContent: Greetings valued customers, somewhat valued employees, and contractors. Dropping by to relay an exciting opportunity from Crab™ LLC. Check it out at https://t.co/kDl0q68iXr and sign up to the mailing list for more info! Have a profitable day 📈 https://t.co/Ld9vWKKta8

renderedContent: Greetings valued customers, somewhat valued employees, and contractors. Dropping by to relay an exciting opportunity from Crab™ LLC. Check it out at bit.ly/CrabLLC and sign up to the mailing list for more info! Have a profitable day 📈 https://t.co/Ld9vWKKta8

text: blaseball.boston

text: bit.ly/CrabLLC


rawContent: Employees are asked to ignore the mounting protests on lower Floors. Security has been dispatched. When entering or exiting Corporate HQ, please wear your complimentary mandatory noise-cancelling headphones and sight-cancelling blindfolds. The Line must go Up. 📈

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @blaseball If you need Tot Fox to accidentally kill another Sun just hit us up

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @Sarksus We're still privately held, for now....

text: blaseball.boston

username: Sarksus


rawContent: @Sarksus High level stock market manipulation and low level lack of gravity

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @catacalypto @blaseball Most lawyers end up in your neck of the woods. We contracted the best ones - most work remotely but they can selectively Haunt interns for in-person meetings. Worst case scenario we pull the old Tillman switcheroo and bring them back for big cases

text: blaseball.boston

username: catacalypto

displayname: Cat Manning


rawContent: @blaseball We have a floor full of lawyers, Hades' best. Yeeting them off the corporate tower against their will now, should be with you shortly

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: This is clearly a bad faith lawsuit attempting to discredit newly instated @blaseball CEO Parker by using facts and logic to make him look bad. If the 99% failed to Eat the Rich this week its their own fault, they should simply work harder to locate the rich and then eat them

text: blaseball.boston

rawContent: The @nymillenials, on behalf of the 99% are suing @blaseball and The Coin for Wire Fraud, over their failure to implement Eat The Rich. (1/??) https://t.co/TdbstVbSnm

username: CDMXWWLegal

displayname: Wild Wings Legal Team

rawDescription: 🍗Legal Team & Minor League Affiliate for the S7 ILB Champion @WildWingsCDMX 🍗 ⚖Sunbeams Court Lawsuit Winner⚖  #wildnotmild

location: We're back!

text: parkerclassaction.com

username: nymillenials

displayname: 📱New York Millennials📱


rawContent: @hmouthsunbeams His day-to-day existence is already a monument to that

displayname: The Baltimore Crabs 🦀👁 @ blaseball.com

text: blaseball.boston

username: hmouthsunbeams

displayname: Hellmouth Sunbeams


rawContent: The "NASA and Moon Partiers v Tot Fox" case has reached the Supreme Court

text: blaseball.boston

rawContent: Nasa to make major announcement about the moon https://t.co/eYB5KoaPFb

renderedContent: Nasa to make major announcement about the moon independent.co.uk/life-style/gad…

username: Independent

displayname: The Independent

rawDescription: News, comment and features from The Independent. Get the app: https://t.co/3YtPa9YnU9…  Telegram: https://t.co/Xji8GXv7cc

renderedDescription: News, comment and features from The Independent. Get the app: independent.onelink.me/no5x/independe…  Telegram: t.me/Independent

text: t.me/Independent

location: London, England

text: independent.co.uk

description: Official

text: independent.co.uk/life-style/gad…

description: Flying observatory that made new discovery is able to ‘pick up phenomenon impossible to see with visible light’, space agency notes

text: t.me/Independent

text: independent.co.uk

description: Official


rawContent: Statement from CEO Harmony H. Henderson: "Charitable donations or "not-for-profit work" might seem like a terrible business decision. But the goodwill generated by seeming altruistic actually generates more net revenue from lifetime customers. Also the tax breaks are sublime."

username: BlaseballCrabs

text: blaseball.boston

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent:
Excited to announce the launch of the Tillman Henderson Memorial Foundation*, a non-profit arm dedicated to improving the lives of less privileged people across the Immaterial Plane and beyond!

* Please note we filed the paperwork whilst he was dead and it costs $200 to re-file

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @magic_blaseball Feeling good and profitable! Until we immediately lost our winnings betting on the Crabs for the 50th loss this season

text: blaseball.boston

displayname: Yellowstone Magic ✨👆👇


rawContent: @DunlapBlaseball Profits Good. Crab™ LLC good as a vehicle for Profit 📈

text: blaseball.boston

username: DunlapBlaseball

displayname: Dunlap Figueroa


rawContent: The Line must go Up. Looking forward to 75 Coins from a passive win and 10k for yet another Brock Forbes shutout. Profits Up! 📈

text: blaseball.boston

rawContent: @BlaseballCrabs crabs good? https://t.co/f632jwOczX

username: patelbeyonce

displayname: patel beyoncé on da TL

rawDescription: steak taco enthusiast 🥩 tenor 1 🥩 he/they 🥩 former pod 🥩 banner & pfp by @annapullara (follow him!)

location: Chasing taco trucks, in Dallas


rawContent: @BLASEBALLFanBot @blaseball Looking forward to 75 coins passive income and 10k from a Brock Forbes Shutout!

text: blaseball.boston

username: BlasedFanBot


rawContent: @blaseball Perfection - this frees up even more time for employees to crunch. This may be our most Profitable quarter yet! 📈

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: "I'm Crab™ LLC CEO Harmony H. Henderson, and this is my Masterclass." https://t.co/Fj2Ga5Oc81

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @catacalypto @BlaseballNews The Line must go Up. We welcome Tigers, Pies or anyone else who wishes to go Up too. The Boss has the paperwork ready. Profits Up! 📈

text: blaseball.boston

username: BlaseballNews

displayname: BLASEBALL NEWS NETWORK


rawContent:
100k+ total votes in 'An Actual Airplane'
48 games played
Total Runs Gained: +0.2

Not very Profitable. Recommend a retroactive SWOT analysis 📉

text: blaseball.boston

rawContent: DRACAENA STOLE A BASE https://t.co/ydtpsyuQPR

username: SIBROfficial

displayname: Society for Internet Blaseball Research 🔮

rawDescription:
We work together to make Blaseball data more accessible. (they/them)

Play @blaseball at https://t.co/IMxUjkI24t. Derive the stars at https://t.co/fb9aBuO6TN 🔮✨

renderedDescription:
We work together to make Blaseball data more accessible. (they/them)

Play @blaseball at blaseball.com. Derive the stars at discord.gg/F8YSJE6 🔮✨

text: blaseball.com

location: Escher Complex, Los Angeli

text: sibr.dev


rawContent: @blaseball We must clean up the League. The Grand Siesta will provide adequate time for a "re-organisation". The CEO is Doing a Profitable Job!

location: The Crabitat, Baltimore, MD

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: Our Health Insurance Policy is "Don't get sick". But if you do get sick, it's often more cost-effective to simply die and have your body couriered to Rejuvenation on Floor 14.

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @w______a______ We have methods of ensuring the 'Mortally-Challenged' can still be productive employees.

text: blaseball.boston

displayname: They call it a mental illness dont they


rawContent: Tweets on this account are the sole intellectual property of Crab™ LLC, and by reading this tweet you automatically agree to our T&C, our EULA and our 36 Month Standard Employment Contract. Welcome to the Company! Your death will not terminate employment.

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: Superior Crab Science has allowed us to achieve our highest Profit ever. The Line is so far Up! 📈 And it's all thanks to this one neat trick the Boss taught us: if you pay workers less than the value of the work they produce, you can generate infinite Profit! Incredible Science.

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @tigrishades If Moody wants to try to contest our registered trademark, we'll happily incinerate a couple of IP Lawyers and schedule a Hall-based meeting!

text: blaseball.boston

username: arrowsuns


rawContent: We now have 3 official channels in our Clawffice "Slack" including the Saltwater-Cooler: perfect for casual social conversations (that have been signed off by your line manager) https://t.co/Ob5uQJDJRA

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent:
📉 Unprofitable: "Close the Book"
📈 Profitable: "Cook the Books"

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: In both cases, we steal as much as possible.

text: blaseball.boston

rawContent: @BlaseballCrabs @blaseball hopefully you run a company better than you run bases.

username: occultclassic

displayname: bennett (they/them)

rawDescription:
🟡⚪🟣⚫ Making narrative games from an undisclosed location.
Prev: Oxenfree 2, Westworld: Awakening, Sprint Vector, Raw Data, 7 Dwarfs, Frontierville

text: bennett.games


rawContent: Immaterial Revenue Service.

renderedContent: Immaterial Revenue Service.

text: blaseball.boston

rawContent: @BlaseballCrabs whats the irs

renderedContent: @BlaseballCrabs whats the irs

displayname: Glass System

rawDescription:
💥 Miriam Ten (she/her)
☁ Miriam Rouka (she/her)
📖 Lathna (she/her)
🗡 Milli (she/ver)
🐁 Betty (shi/her)
system priv @fracturedmir

location: hell


rawContent: @hmouthsunbeams The Boss helped us store our assets in an offshore plane of existence

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: Blagonballs are subject to Capital Gains Tax. Reporting the Keepers to the IRS.

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @blaseball If you think we are losing, it's because the Optics don't extend far enough to see our Quarterly Earnings Report.

text: blaseball.boston

displayname: BLASEBALL COMMISSIONER


rawContent: @tillmanrules your mom is our CEO dude, she skipped your first funeral because she had a meeting conflict

text: blaseball.boston

username: tillmanrules

displayname: Tillman Henderson 69th inductee to the Hall o Fame


rawContent: Congrats, you found us. But have you found gainful employment at the #1 Rated 'Growing Ascended Company' in Brock Forbes Magazine? Profits Up 📈 https://t.co/pIW4RA287O

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: Carcinization was always limited by proximity to the Olde One. But what if you could carcinize anyone, anywhere, at any time? Our new Crab App (or Crapp™) enables Remote Carcinization to anywhere with a stable 4G connection. Tomorrow is the Future of Yesterday, Today!

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @blaseball Once again CEO Parker acts as the leader we need. The Executive Team are doing a Profitable Job!

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @ian_is_uhhhhh Absolutely, we have loads of openings in our Engineering department - most of them slots for various circuits and cards. Head on over to Onboarding!

text: blaseball.boston

displayname: ian


rawContent: Operative Best dispatched for Collection. He'll be with you soon! Use the official Crab App (or Crapp™) to track how many stops before he arrives.

text: blaseball.boston

rawContent:
@BlaseballCrabs Sounds good. I am opening it right now.

There is nothing in here. Is this a prank.
Signed. Tot fWAUGH HELP *sounds of a fox being hastily stuffed in a cardboard shipping box*

displayname: Tot Fox

rawDescription: #tootottootrot Star shadow player for the Lovers. Destined for chaos. She/Her. The first Blaseball player to blow up the sun. PFP by @ratgills. Signed. Tot Fox.

location: Sand Francisco???

text: blaseball.com


rawContent: @grgcnnr And We're Hiring!

renderedContent: @grgcnnr And We're Hiring!

text: blaseball.boston

username: grgcnnr

displayname: George ★★★☆☆ Connor (parodaddy)


rawContent: Yes little fox, it's an Ascension gift. Please open the gift in a quiet location alone

text: blaseball.boston

rawContent: It's a shipping box. The return address reads "Crab™ LLC". @BlaseballCrabs how did you send this to me. Should I open it. Signed. Tot Fox

renderedDescription: #tootottootrot Star shadow player for the Lovers. Destined for chaos. She/Her. The first Blaseball player to blow up the sun. PFP by @ratgills. Signed. Tot Fox.

text: blaseball.com

text: blaseball.com


rawContent: @BlaseballTimes Up.

renderedContent: @BlaseballTimes Up.

text: blaseball.boston

username: BlaseballTimes


rawContent: @BlaseballTimes Absolutely, head to Media and Propaganda (External) to collect your Press Credentials.

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @NSplortscaster Profits Up! 📈

renderedContent: @NSplortscaster Profits Up! 📈

text: blaseball.boston

username: NYMSplortscast


rawContent: We may be losing at Blaseball but we're winning against the IRS (Immaterial Revenue Service)

text: blaseball.boston

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: Tot Fox is looking for a tailor that does formal wear for small mammals. Forrest Best is our entire delivery network. Most Brocks work in marketing. Luis is a projector. Nagomi is in Hawai'i. Half the players on the field are just random unpaid interns

text: blaseball.boston

rawContent: Crabs are now 0-6 in the Ascendant League.

displayname: Blaseball Radio (Unofficial)

rawDescription:
Your radio host, Radio Host!

Unofficial fan commentary
Commentating Blaseball on https://t.co/EIb2g1xREA
https://t.co/mJCqazn4tN

renderedDescription:
Your radio host, Radio Host!

Unofficial fan commentary
Commentating Blaseball on Twitch.tv/blaseball_radio
youtube.com/channel/UC-YQ1…


rawContent: @BfWinkler @BOF_SCORES If you ever ascend and want a job, We're Hiring!

displayname: The Baltimore Crabs 🦀👁 @ blaseball.com

text: blaseball.boston

username: BfWinkler

displayname: Nic Winkler

displayname: SCORES BASERUNNER


rawContent: @IrisScreams Season 7 was a dark time

renderedContent: @IrisScreams Season 7 was a dark time

text: blaseball.boston

username: MakerIris


rawContent: @BfWinkler We're a C corp, our trading name is just Crab™ LLC to take advantage of a multi-dimensional tax loophole

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: RE: Last RT - We may occasionally share things that seem to have zero direct impact on increasing Profits. But don't despair - by sharing high quality Crab™ LLC content for free, we can attract more Users and increase Conversion. The Line must go Up! 📈

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: If you're going to eat someone's lunch out of the shared office fridge, please check it's actually Food first. And if you ate the "food" from the "lunchbox" on 6, please report to Medical ASAP

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @AdalbertoTosser We noticed you hadn't signed in to work yet! We think you'll really like it, you have your own spacious office on one of the floors that isn't draining. Head over to HR to be assigned a Productive Job

text: blaseball.boston

username: AdalbertoTosser

displayname: Adalberto Tosser


rawContent: @LoversBlaseball Workplace relationships are discouraged as they affect productivity. However your new Branding looks fantastic, and will certainly help the Profits go Up! 📈

text: blaseball.boston

username: LoversBlaseball

displayname: San Francisco Lovers, Sponsored by Nap Time


rawContent: @HOU_SPI_RAD_TRA Corporate Espionage is a form of espionage, and it makes the Profits go Up! Join the Group 📈

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: Applications from Umpires are encouraged! They have many transferable skills and make great managers, mainly due to their ability to incinerate under-performing direct reports https://t.co/WdOqQqVGXo

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @robinqazplm the blood tests claim he is her son, but she'd like a 2nd opinion

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent:
Feeling inspired tonight by all of the Business happening on the official Crab™ LLC Open Clawffice Slack!

Unfortunately management decided to save money by not actually paying for Slack, so our Slack is 1 channel in the Crabs Discord. But still, the Profits must go Up! 📈 https://t.co/vyOE60CAWp

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: Any Crabs™ LLC Union representatives please report to the 13th Floor for free delicious Birthday Cake! 🎂 Wow, it's delicious and free only for all union reps!

text: blaseball.boston

rawContent:
Over 11/13 of @BlaseballCrabs employees support unionizing.
Join it. Join it. Join it. Join it. Join it. Join it. Join it. Join it. Join it. Join it. Join it. Join it. Join it.

username: CrabsLLCUnion

displayname: Crabs LLC Union

renderedDescription: Workers' union @BlaseballCrabs. Claws up for workers' rights!


rawContent: Official Statement from our CEO Harmony H. Henderson: "I look forward to a long and fruitful relationship with CEO Parker and the returned ILB Management. Having recently ascended, we here at Crab™ LLC fully support Fair Play across the League for remaining teams. Good luck!"

username: BlaseballCrabs

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @borkchamp Absolutely! Head to the Impressions Department on Floor 7.

text: blaseball.boston

username: borkfighters


rawContent: The Tower of Crabylon has been formally converted into our incredible new Corporate HQ. If you are confused about where to go, head to Floor 5 for Floor Location Services. If you can't find Floor 5, head to Floor ∞ five times. Reminder that travel time between floors is unpaid.

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @FinnJamesBC Head to the Card department on Floor 25. We recommend collecting some Birthday Cards and Playing Cards while you're there! Also you need a new job, please lay on the ground and wait for the Job Allocation Unit to find you

text: blaseball.boston

username: FinnJamesBC

displayname: Finn James, Unrepentant Criminal


rawContent: @prolixpost We have many profits and only 3 losses so far. An excellent spread. I'll request an investment pack be sent over

text: blaseball.boston

username: prolixpost

displayname: Sam Dee


rawContent: @HonkeyBananas Our Business Model (patent pending) involved a lot of Business. And a lot of Modeling too. But most of all, the Profits go Up! 📈

text: blaseball.boston

username: HonkeyBananas

displayname: Nicholas "MonkHB" Esposito 🔜 Dreamhack Atlanta


rawContent: @kefteneften Absolutely! We have dozens of Stapling Positions at all levels open on the 17th floors!

text: blaseball.boston

username: keftenefte


rawContent: @maker_tec Welcome aboard! Report to New Talent Ingest on Floor 2.2

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @leo60228 Please check in with Brand Director Brock "The Marketing Rock" Forbes before issuing any public communications!

text: blaseball.boston

displayname: vriska (parody)


rawContent: @tayloriskatniss Every.

renderedContent: @tayloriskatniss Every.

text: blaseball.boston

username: tayloriskatniss

displayname: taylor catlin


rawContent: @3amepiphany Welcome aboard! Please Report to New Talent Ingest on Floor 7.5!

text: blaseball.boston

displayname: ☆ cat plinko ☆ Chet AwesomeLaser 🐀


rawContent: We apologize for the actions of our disgraced (former) Social Media Manager. Their statements are not representative of C™lab LLC or the Boss Group. They have been reassigned to the 13th floor. Please do not attempt to contact or find them.

text: blaseball.boston

rawContent: Other teams may talk a big anticapitalism game, but Crabs are the only creatures with 2 tiny portable guillotines attached to their bodies

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @tigrishades Only by blood!

renderedContent: @tigrishades Only by blood!

text: blaseball.boston

username: arrowsuns


rawContent:
When we first ascended, we were confused and scared. But the Boss helped us understand.

With her investment and the guidance of our new CEO Harmony Henderson, we have formed a new shell corporation. Welcome to Carcinization 2.0. Welcome to Crab™ LLC.

And we're hiring! https://t.co/zfE8RNGpCv

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @HOU_SPI_RAD_TRA about that...

renderedContent: @HOU_SPI_RAD_TRA about that...

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @WinstonWolfey There's already like 3, I'm not Japanese nor do I have a deep connection to Japan, and I'm not sure I wanna move to the lift. We'll see though

text: blaseball.boston

username: WinstonWolfey

displayname: Rocco Gest


rawContent: @CHSSTFans Tillman didn't lose a single game against the Crabs in the final. clearly earned those headphones...

text: blaseball.boston

username: CHSSTFans

displayname: 👟 Charleston Shoe Thieves 👟


rawContent: Suggestion: the person running this Twitter should be Japanese to avoid tweets like this https://t.co/GY0rc3j1Jh

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: so long gay blaseball

renderedContent: so long gay blaseball

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: claws up, for maybe the last time https://t.co/n8RmMECokj

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: me yelling at the remaining blaseball gods, hours before disaster: "What are ya gonna do? Obliterate our team and retire all 13 of our active players?"

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: I was super tired when I posted this but I forgot Oliver Notarobot, the lovable scamp who got stolen and swapped for Luis. miss u

text: blaseball.boston

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @Stevenson_GPA https://t.co/VAGvOkeiu4

renderedContent: @Stevenson_GPA https://t.co/VAGvOkeiu4

text: blaseball.boston

displayname: GPA_ Stevenson


rawContent:
THERAPIST: I think you're using this Blaseball game as a distraction, a means to escape your own horror at the state of things, at the monotony of your current unfulfilling life

ME PLACING MY SILLY LITTLE BETS: haha yeah totally

text: blaseball.boston

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: "I don't get what's so hard to understand here. Crabs swept the playoffs, activating the Black Hole and murdering the sun. After securing ascension, they were one shot KO by a big nut who was beaten by 14 undead squidlings. Did they not cover that in your Therapy degree or what?"

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: daddy Parker said we've been disciplined enough this era 🥺👏

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @Stevenson_GPA up

renderedContent: @Stevenson_GPA up

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: No matter what happens today it's been an honor and a privilege to steward these crabs from [crabs bad] to [crabs good], and I'm proud to have helped in whatever small ways I did. Claws up for the 3 time Championship winning, first to ascend team: The Baltimore Crabs! 🦀👁

text: blaseball.boston

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: Crabs fans still hold a lot of love for ex-Crabs players. Nora and Combs were taken by the umps too soon. Valentine Games left to explore the league. Holden Stanton is small and thriving. Much love to Joshua Watson, PolkaDot Patterson, Axel Trololol & yes, even Tillman Henderson

text: blaseball.boston

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: We love our players - our 8 OGs, and our newer crabs. We would die to protect Tot Fox. Nagomi flew back and forth from Baltimore to Breckenridge, sometimes in a shell. Luis has been fantastic, Finn James is a quality pitcher, and Silvaire has quickly cemented herself as a crab

text: blaseball.boston

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: The Crabs were the 2nd worst team in Season 1. Over time thanks to a lot of luck, coordination, new player outreach and the work of a lot of amazing Crabs fans, we managed to go from the 2nd worst team in the league to one of the best, setting records and winning 3 championships

text: blaseball.boston

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent:
We are ascending later today with 8 / 14 of our original lineup:
Forrest Best
Kennedy Loser
Parker Parra
Sutton Dreamy
Brock Forbes
Adalberto Tosser
Montgomery Bullock
Pedro Davids

Non-OG Crabs:
Nagomi (S4)
Finn James (S4)
Tot Fox (S4)
Luis Acevedo (S7)
Silvaire Roadhouse (S9)

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @2tot2fox @hmouthsunbeams with over 50,000 Blaseball fans, players and supporting staff trapped on the moon during this event, Tot Fox now has the highest KD ratio in the ILB

text: blaseball.boston

displayname: Tot Fox

username: hmouthsunbeams

displayname: Hellmouth Sunbeams


displayname: The Baltimore Crabs 🦀👁 @ blaseball.com

text: blaseball.boston

rawContent: For reference, the Crabs started the fight with 31,993 Team Spirit.

username: SIBROfficial

displayname: Society for Internet Blaseball Research 🔮

text: blaseball.com

text: sibr.dev

text: blaseball.com

text: sibr.dev


rawContent: that feel when you accidentally murder the sun https://t.co/jGeOhwt8BF

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: Where Were You when a smol fox Killed The Sun? https://t.co/t9PC1SrcSn

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: (updated the evergreen tweet to account for a growing team, The Game Band is Doing a Great Job)

text: blaseball.boston

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: Blaseball isn't a video game, it's a social experiment designed to see what happens when a team of game developers have all of their weekends ruined for the rest of their lives

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @hmouthsunbeams sorry for your loss :(

renderedContent: @hmouthsunbeams sorry for your loss :(

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: their slogan should be updated to "Stare into the Sun 2..."

text: blaseball.boston

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: the Hellmouth Sunbeams should become the Hellmouth Sun 2 Beams

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: we did it for Combs

renderedContent: we did it for Combs

text: blaseball.boston

rawContent: oh nice🩸⚾ https://t.co/m7bfq85Lam

renderedContent: oh nice🩸⚾ https://t.co/m7bfq85Lam

username: blaseball

displayname: BLASEBALL COMMISSIONER

rawDescription: Official news for INTERNET LEAGUE #BLASEBALL. From the desk of Blaseball Commissioner and @thegameband boss Parker MacMillan IIIII

text: blaseball.com


rawContent: @blaseball please dont say sike : (

renderedContent: @blaseball please dont say sike : (

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent:
Crabs Season 10:
- 69 wins. nice
- swept the playoffs
- hit 10 wins in the final game to activate the black hole, resetting us to zero runs
- forrest best stole home to shame and win the game
- won 3 championships and ascended?
- revived tillman who then faces zero consequences

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent:
HALL MONITOR: The 14 of you have been chosen in death by the Blaseball community to return and defeat the Shelled One, saving Blaseball from the discipline era

TILLMAN: nah im good thanks

text: blaseball.boston

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: Tillman literally dodged the draft....

renderedContent: Tillman literally dodged the draft....

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent:
yurts trunbo: oh hey u guys are back early

silvaire roadhouse: god's dead

yurts trunbo: what?

astronaut: *loading a pistol and getting back on the team bus* boss is on her way

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @blaseball we're going up parker, thanks for all ur help and support : )

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: crabs canonically good https://t.co/KFmywjEdLM

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent:
so noone told you life was gonna be this way
your gods a joke your broke, and jaylen's gone away

text: blaseball.boston

rawContent: Friends

renderedContent: Friends

username: BlaseballMic

displayname: The Macrophone

rawDescription: ONLINE

renderedDescription: ONLINE


rawContent:
@BlaseballMic so noone told you life was gonna be this way
your gods a joke your broke, and jaylen's gone away

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @blaseball god is dead commish

renderedContent: @blaseball god is dead commish

text: blaseball.boston


text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: Our plan to score 10 runs in our final game, prematurely triggering the Black Hole, swallowing the runs and setting us back to zero so we could then shame the Shoe Thieves to win our 3rd Championship and ascend has worked perfectly

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: this is fine.... this is fine....... https://t.co/DBJQR3D8rE

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @blaseball this is fine.... this is fine.......

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: new chant, love this community lol https://t.co/Qs2sz65tJb

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @allogoblins make this an official Blaseball Cares design tbh

text: blaseball.boston

username: allogoblins

displayname: 𝕽𝖔𝖘𝖑𝖞𝖓


rawContent: @MiamiBlaseball im a simple crab i see da crab in the top right i click da Like button

text: blaseball.boston

username: miamiblaseball

displayname: Miami Dale


rawContent: 2-0 against the Shoe Thieves in the final. We only need to win 1 more game to ascend. What could go wrong? 🙃 https://t.co/3X3pcpbqKj

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent:
@2tot2fox hit ball
run base
defend well
claws up
ascend little fox

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: shoe crab https://t.co/2MKWzzqJsv

renderedContent: shoe crab https://t.co/2MKWzzqJsv

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: our plans https://t.co/vFmPxTb8RJ

renderedContent: our plans https://t.co/vFmPxTb8RJ

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @blaseball thank u parker

renderedContent: @blaseball thank u parker

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @liminalnobilis such is my approach to everything in life

text: blaseball.boston

username: queenofnevers


rawContent: channeling all my energy tonight into lowering my expectations and snuffing out any spark of hope, such is the Crabs way

username: BlaseballCrabs

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @manieldanning maybe more

renderedContent: @manieldanning maybe more

text: blaseball.boston

username: manieldanning

displayname: trickster richard


rawContent: @FoxClawmentary some of the players carcinized their feet, the unstealable hard shell shoe

text: blaseball.boston

username: FoxClawmentary

displayname: Orange Fox


rawContent: cant have ur shoes stolen if they were already stolen last weekend, think about it

text: blaseball.boston


text: blaseball.boston

username: RichardsonGames

displayname: Dickson Games

username: nymillenials

displayname: 📱New York Millennials📱


rawContent: yes queen 🤐

renderedContent: yes queen 🤐

text: blaseball.boston

rawContent: @BlaseballCrabs Stop talking.

renderedContent: @BlaseballCrabs Stop talking.

username: NagomiMcdaniel

displayname: NAGOMI MCDANIEL

location: The Vault

text: blaseball.com


rawContent: @NoStarsLars1 exactly, when you sweep us it will be all the more shameful

text: blaseball.boston

displayname: Lars Taylor


rawContent: @tacoblaseball @XenaKitty1122 honestly probably

text: blaseball.boston

username: tacoblaseball

displayname: LA Unlimited Tacos

displayname: Xena #BlackLivesMatter 🌮


rawContent: @XenaKitty1122 @tacoblaseball you did amazing! sad we don't get to play you but next season you'll do even better I'm sure! GG!!!

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: Crabs are once again the only Playoffs team capable of winning a 3rd Championship and ascending. So ascension is delayed another week at least...

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: This is an unofficial community-run Twitter account for a fictional sports team. Our goal is to keep things light and funny and add value to the Blaseball community. If you have a problem with anything we post please reach out, our DMs are open

text: blaseball.boston

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: We deleted an earlier tweet that blamed a whole team for the actions of some fans. We apologize, this was wrong and is exactly what people have done to the Crabs. Please don't attack any teams or use screenshots of our deleted tweets to support your points, we do not condone this

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @TurnipOnBlase https://t.co/HlQRfoPxyU

renderedContent: @TurnipOnBlase https://t.co/HlQRfoPxyU

text: blaseball.boston

username: TurnipOnBlase

displayname: Paula Turnip ©


rawContent: @sn0wglass its a good show 🧡

renderedContent: @sn0wglass its a good show 🧡

text: blaseball.boston

displayname: es (can not log off)


rawContent:
FATT PZN 36 Spoilers
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
Just realized Tillman Henderson has the exact same character arc as Clementine Kesh

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: This Thread is now the Official Tillman Henderson Debt Repayment scheme. Please reply to take your place in the queue. Each request will be dealt with, starting with his immediate family, then his friends, then the beneficiaries of that carnival fire he "accidentally" started

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: For losing against the Shelled One's Pods, the Shoe Thieves were supposed to receive 5 curses, but they only received 3 curses. At first we thought this was a bug. Now we realize the other 2 were just delayed...

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: The plan is simple: We incinerate Tillman Henderson a 2nd time because he deserves it

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @blaseball Project Killman Enderson has executed perfectly. Thanks to all for their help

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: Can't believe the Crabs have done this.......

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @nameoftheyear we're aware lol, but if you spoil people's imaginary blaseball fun ya gonna get called out on it : )

text: blaseball.boston

username: nameoftheyear

displayname: Elliot 🔮


rawContent:
@MiamiBlaseball Crabs actively supported the Snackrifice and Crabs fans worked hard to get as many players above the line as possible

Crabs supported Jaylen resurrection and worked hard to keep her in Idol 14

Not our fault if 1000s of random people left their idol on the best pitcher 🤷♀

displayname: The Baltimore Crabs 🦀👁 @ blaseball.com

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @ironfairy_ *sweating* who... who is she??

text: blaseball.boston

displayname: IronFairy - Fernanda Dias


rawContent: @ironfairy_ he's consolidating his many small debts into one easily manageable and deadly debt

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: The final score for the Baltimore Crabs in Season 10. Please reply appropriately https://t.co/w3yewYTUk7

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @joel_a_clark local function bullshitTwitter(intended_salt_level)

text: blaseball.boston

displayname: joel a clark


rawContent: get these players into these positions on the Idol board so we can murder this nut god in cold protein-enriched blood. thank u https://t.co/HLZ8f4Whbn

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @blaseball We are All From Chiclawgo 🦀🔥

renderedContent: @blaseball We are All From Chiclawgo 🦀🔥

text: blaseball.boston

displayname: BLASEBALL COMMISSIONER


rawContent: stan the @MoistTalkers having their best ever season (and being #1 or #2 in standings). seeing different teams thrive rules! 🦀❤🗣

text: blaseball.boston

username: MoistTalkers

displayname: Canada Moist Talkers


rawContent: "By the way, I would have voted for Tillman to be incinerated a third time if I could." https://t.co/mEMdJecOMH

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @Rosvo11 As long as you're sharing your inane thoughts loudly and confidently, the medium doesn't matter! Have fun!!

text: blaseball.boston

displayname: Rosvo1 🦀


rawContent: Blaseball is more than just the simulated games on your browser screen. There's a meta-layer taking place on Twitter and Discord where an entire community of fans work together to create an endless sea of mind numbing discourse. And participation is mandatory

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @blaseball But but but..... no garages in playoffs? :'(

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @liminalnobilis Crabs are always moist queen

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: Apparently we're in the Playoffs. That's good news I guess. Our plan to get absolutely smashed to pieces by the Moist Talkers is afoot. hopefully in the 9th inning of the 5th final game if we're lucky

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @DecSuzanne killman enderson is coming back ma petite flamme. please place a preemptive order for several crates of Monster Energy Ultra

text: blaseball.boston

username: DecSuzanne

displayname: Declan


rawContent: @blaseball exactly! this time we promise we wont lose in the semi-finals or choke in the 9th inning of the 5th game of the final 🙂😐☹

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @MillsSquad @FlangraphsBlase without hesitation, yes

text: blaseball.boston

username: SizzleSquadDTX

username: millssquad

displayname: mills squad 🍇


rawContent: @cyborg_squid thats implied

renderedContent: @cyborg_squid thats implied

text: blaseball.boston

displayname: Connor Wilson


rawContent: @hmouthsunbeams grats

renderedContent: @hmouthsunbeams grats

text: blaseball.boston

username: hmouthsunbeams

displayname: Hellmouth Sunbeams


rawContent: @FoxClawmentary dont tell us what to do

renderedContent: @FoxClawmentary dont tell us what to do

text: blaseball.boston

displayname: Orange Fox


rawContent: @AxelTrololol @RoadhouseBlase @SHELLEDONESPODS hmmmm... I think we'd remember that... what was the name again? Alex something?

text: blaseball.boston

username: AxelTrololol

displayname: Axel Trololol

username: RoadhouseBlase

displayname: Silvaire Roadhouse

username: SHELLEDONESPODS

displayname: SHELLED ONE'S PODS


rawContent: @AxelTrololol @RoadhouseBlase @SHELLEDONESPODS who are you?

username: BlaseballCrabs

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @thegameband i'll give you 24 USD and https://t.co/WVTP7nSsph for it

renderedContent: @thegameband i'll give you 24 USD and tillman.sucks for it

text: blaseball.boston

text: tillman.sucks

username: thegameband

displayname: The Game Band


rawContent:
TILLMAN: what are ya gonna do? incinerate me??
ROGUE UMP: .....
*1 week later*
TILLMAN: what are ya gonna do? resurrect me??
THE HALL MONITOR: .....

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: when we incinerate him a third time it'll be REALLY funny

text: blaseball.boston

rawContent: can I just say that I love that we discovered the Necromancy Idolization because the Crabs thought it would be funny to incinerate Tillman Henderson twice

username: catacalypto

displayname: Cat Manning

rawDescription: Narrative Lead @ Firaxis. Nebula-nominated narrative designer/writer. Blaseball; procgen text. prev: Riot, Pathologic 2, S&S, WTWTLW. Lit PhD; personal account.

location: LA

text: catacalypto.substack.com


rawContent: that's rough buddy, gg

renderedContent: that's rough buddy, gg

text: blaseball.boston

rawContent: With a 14-0 loss to the Crabs, the @hmouthsunbeams have become the first team to enter #PARTYTIME! And with their win, the @BlaseballCrabs have become the first team to punch their ticket to the playoffs! Congratulations to both teams!

username: BlaseballPro

displayname: Blaseball Prospectus

rawDescription: Welcome to Blaseball Prospectus – your source for blaseball reaction, meta analysis, & tomfoolery. Part of @BlaseballNews, unaffiliated with @blaseball.

location: ACAB BLM


rawContent: @BlaseballPro @hmouthsunbeams that's rough buddy

displayname: The Baltimore Crabs 🦀👁 @ blaseball.com

text: blaseball.boston


text: blaseball.boston

username: breakingcreech

displayname: Ben


rawContent: @HanMechanical he owes a lot of us a lot of money

text: blaseball.boston

username: HanMechanical

displayname: Drew the Crab


rawContent: @elvisfigpies It'll be different this time. Jaylen didn't want to hurt anyone and was deeply conflicted. Tillman is incapable of empathy or human conflict. He will bean without mercy or regret

text: blaseball.boston

username: ElvisFigPies

displayname: Elvis Figueroa Marijuana ☀🥧 (closed)


rawContent:
Killman Enderson is canon y'all! The icon turns blue when the recently deceased Tillman is idol'd into that spot

Time for Necromancy 2: Tillman Boogaloo https://t.co/vr54RiS9aY

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @blaseball Killman Enderson is canon motherfuckers. Time for some good old fashioned necromancy with a modern squid twist

text: blaseball.boston

username: blaseball

displayname: BLASEBALL COMMISSIONER


rawContent: if we somehow manage to win the playoffs and ascend and Ascension completely obliterates our team including myself, please pass on a message to my surviving family: the message is "claws up baybeeeee, crabs good!!! 🦀🦀🦀 im glad im dead it was worth it"

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: The Immaterial Plan = The Pale. Kim Supports the Revachol Giraffes

text: blaseball.boston

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: so obviously I meant to retweet this on my personal account but, ya know what? I stand by it https://t.co/KTrJkc6DrW

renderedContent: so obviously I meant to retweet this on my personal account but, ya know what? I stand by it twitter.com/TheTimoAlbert/…

text: blaseball.boston

text: twitter.com/TheTimoAlbert/…

rawContent: @caseykfrey that’s what’s up 🕺#DiscoElysium https://t.co/R4HhLQOvh5

username: TheTimoAlbert

displayname: Timo Albert

rawDescription: Motion Graphic Designer at ZA/UM studios, working on Disco Elysium (Ex G-Unit / 50 Cent, Shady Records)

location: EAST BLOCK

username: caseykfrey

displayname: Casey Frey


rawContent: @alicode1111 @blaseball we typically don't decide our voting strategy until Saturday after the playoffs, because so much can happen. If you use Discord, I recommend joining our Crabs-only Discord https://t.co/8l9o72jf7D

renderedContent: @alicode1111 @blaseball we typically don't decide our voting strategy until Saturday after the playoffs, because so much can happen. If you use Discord, I recommend joining our Crabs-only Discord tillmansucks.com

text: blaseball.boston

text: tillmansucks.com

username: obspogon


rawContent: We regret to inform you that this years Blaseball Industry Conference (BIC) has been postponed due to normal weather. A virtual conference experience will be announced as soon as Forrest Best finishes running high speed fiber optic lines (strands) to all the surviving US cities

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @Keganexe @HxOvAx we appreciate it kegan 🧡🧡🧡

text: blaseball.boston

username: Keganexe

displayname: KeganExe ♏ Bully on Main ♏ 🐀


rawContent: @GazOfAllTrades @blaseball Claws Up, Baybeeee! 🦀👁

text: blaseball.boston

username: GazOfAllTrades

displayname: Gaz of all Trades


rawContent: @hifridays we don't speak for her but I don't think she's mad at anyone or anything except that fucking big nut. she talks about York a lot. the team really helped her adjust to being back out on the field ❤

text: blaseball.boston

username: hifridays

displayname: Hawaiʻi Fridays


rawContent: 🥳😭 https://t.co/o9clr16cwX

renderedContent: 🥳😭 https://t.co/o9clr16cwX

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: unshell your mind https://t.co/W5UM6fxVFV

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: A Stranger is just a Friend you haven't Carcinized yet 🥰🦀

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent:
HERESY, SUFFER SUPER ALLERGIES
RAISE THE DEAD BACK FROM THE HALL, THE PITCHER MUST THROW THE BALL
BUT ITS JUST THE DEBT I PAY, ASCENSION IS CALLING ME
OPEN UP MY SINGLE EYE
IM MISTER CRAB GUY

text: blaseball.boston

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent:
Coming out of my shell
And I'm doing just fine
Gotta gotta eat fire
Because I cannot die
It started out with a sip
How did it end up like this?
It was only a sip, it was only a sip

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: Having to run 5 bases to score 1 run? Umm that's pretty cringe bro

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @hifridays : (

renderedContent: @hifridays : (

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @hifridays thats mean hawai'i fridays not very vibes : (

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @hifridays we haven't been eligible to party for like 4 seasons, this sucks :(

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent:
FOR IMEDAT RELEAS!

NEW PRESS RELEAS FROM CRAB. MANY BALTIMORE. SUBSCRIBSHUN TO ADOBE CREATIVE CLOUD RUN OUT, NO PROBLEM :) https://t.co/QJsvnZqIwj

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @Foampunch in Season 59 our team consistents of 1 batter and 1 pitcher: they are both Nagomi. She pitches then immediately fields

text: blaseball.boston

username: foampunch

displayname: FoamPunch


rawContent: y'all stop, they need that blood we think! maybe idk https://t.co/dIVVxkKCnF

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @BlaseballOOC @cableknitjumper still got a few more to go Amy!

text: blaseball.boston

username: BlaseballOOC

displayname: Blaseball Out of Context


text: blaseball.boston

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: If an ump tried to incinerate me I would simply eat the flame, become magmatic and then hit a game-winning homerun. not hard

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @screenrant Zero mention of the Baltimore Crabs, even when it would have added context. Article Rating: 0/5 stars ⚫⚫⚫⚫⚫

text: blaseball.boston

username: screenrant

displayname: Screen Rant


rawContent: @floofstrid @blaseball idk if that math is accurate, or any math really

username: BlaseballCrabs

text: blaseball.boston

username: floofstrid

displayname: Astrid 🦋


rawContent: @floofstrid @blaseball we weren't the highest bidder doesn't count

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @Dangodofthunder no retreat, no progress, only move sideways and claws up

text: blaseball.boston

username: Dangodofthunder

displayname: DanGodOfThunder


rawContent: @Beff_bezos yep, we don't know what it does yet. us (Crabs), Tigers and Pies all have 2 championship wins

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: Did we win the Season 9 Championship? No. Did we win any of the blessings we wanted? No. But are we gonna try our best this season to not choke at the last minute, then ascend and kill God? Also no

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: wait there's a whole ass video game about blaseball? i thought we were just doing an elaborate and occasionally horny extended twitter RP 😩

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @blaseball this is total BS, once again the biased Blaseball gods (and nobody else) have prevented us from being able to run a delicious 5th base

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: THE BLACK HOLE ACTIVATES (in our dreams) https://t.co/eIhv0MqSja

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @KnightUrlacher we always loved you, blood or no blood 🧡🧡🧡

text: blaseball.boston

username: KnightBlaseball


rawContent: dont worry, thanks for the quick fix devs! https://t.co/AHtjzJqHx9

text: blaseball.boston

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: crossposting from bugs channel, there seems to be some sort of mistake. the unbeatable and impossibly powerful Crabs have a lower number. is this a UI display bug? are the numbers the wrong way around or... ? https://t.co/GjLkcFCRbR

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: what do you mean "If"?

renderedContent: what do you mean "If"?

text: blaseball.boston

rawContent: If Tillman Henderson gets incinerated off the Crabs and then comes back to defeat god he will be EVEN MORE UNBEARABLE

username: catacalypto

displayname: Cat Manning

renderedDescription: Narrative Lead @ Firaxis. Nebula-nominated narrative designer/writer. Blaseball; procgen text. prev: Riot, Pathologic 2, S&S, WTWTLW. Lit PhD; personal account.

text: catacalypto.substack.com


rawContent: @blaseball love u too commish : )

renderedContent: @blaseball love u too commish : )

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: wait, every other division gets to play Tetris as well as Blaseball??? unfair! 😠 https://t.co/GEJkOCvtwG

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @blaseball Time for Tillman Henderson to accumulate some more debt

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @zopocalypse Low-key loads of Crabs were really excited about 5th base the first time round, "it's the most mechanically interesting" and "what would that look like? Where would the 5th base go?" we're topics of discussion. But we knew contesting Bless Off was nigh on impossible

text: blaseball.boston

username: zopocalypse

displayname: Zo-wheee!


rawContent:
THE GAME BAND: New Decrees! You can vote for a 5th Base! Imagine the possibilities, what would that even look like??? 🤔
FANS: no thanks Bless Off it is :)
TGB: .......
*2 seasons later*
TGB: 5th Base is now a blessing and guaranteed to make it in the game you little shits

displayname: The Baltimore Crabs 🦀👁 @ blaseball.com

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @carlyraejetfuel exactly

renderedContent: @carlyraejetfuel exactly

text: blaseball.boston

username: carlyraejetfuel

displayname: paintball's cathedral


rawContent: God, I'm so excited to watch Nagomi play a regular season for the first time since Season 6. Our lineup is Tot Fox > Forrest Best > Nagomi Mcdaniel > Kennedy Loser, the absolutely vibes combo off the charts. Welcome back!!!

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @PomegranateSee3 That's pretty shit 😐

renderedContent: @PomegranateSee3 That's pretty shit 😐

text: blaseball.boston

displayname: Pomegranate Seeds


rawContent: Same for Aldon Cashmoney, PolkaDot Patterson, Hahn Fox, Thomas Dracaena and Paula Turnip. If you're still idoling these players from the Playoffs I think the members of these teams would really appreciate you switching off, nobody wants their favorite good players to be killed :(

text: blaseball.boston

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: If you're still idoling Nagomi Mcdaniel could you please stop? There's a blessing that incinerates the most idolised player on a team and she only just got out her shell, we really don't want to accidentally win that blessing and have her die :(

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: "Blaseball"? Sorry, I don't watch anime 🤤

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent:
sometimes i feel i've got to
 [crab 🦀]    [crab 🦀]
run away i've got to

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @haxolotl2000 +5 hours on Friday wouldn't be so bad. Could shorten the main season even if needed. Lots of solutions, I'm sure TGB could come up with even better ones

text: blaseball.boston

displayname: Turn-B GM


rawContent: @ManishEarth It's possible but awkward because games are variable length and a break is nice. Best-of-5 is the best format, so figuring out some way of not having all 9-15 of those games take place sequentially would be best. Shorter main season? Format shift? Final on Sunday?

text: blaseball.boston

username: ManishEarth

displayname: Manish


rawContent: I think for the long term health of the game, the community and the devs, it can't require your attention for the whole weekend. Even just the live stuff being so late on a Saturday sucks. Needs a format change. Start earlier? QF and SF on Friday, Finals + events on Saturday?

text: blaseball.boston

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: Participating fully in Blaseball means basically giving up your entire Saturday. The super fun live event stuff happens late evening or worse, early morning in EU. After that you're too buzzed to sleep. Elections happen Sunday. That's the whole weekend wiped for people who care

text: blaseball.boston

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: Almost OOC, but playoffs + post-final events running from 9am EST every Saturday is unsustainable imo. Playoffs can run up to 15 hours, so that's midnight EST plus 1h for cutscenes + peanut fight. Even after it finishes everyone is hyped up on adrenaline + wants to discuss, vote

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @binotbinary ye lol my bad it's 4am bst :((

text: blaseball.boston

username: binotbinary

displayname: Bi Not Binary


rawContent: we all got really distracted but gratz to the shoe thieves on a championship gg close fun tense games u earned it 💜♥🧡

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: this is rly fun and all but could we not do this at 3pm UTC / 11pm EST next week?

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: Uh oh, all the shelled and peanut players have been taken by the nut God from their respective teams. What are your thoughts on this Nagomi Mcdaniel?

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: If you are confused about what just happened, Blaseball is a JRPG now

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: Our plan to make it all the way to the final then get beaten 3-2 by the shoe thieves so we don't lose a boss fight to the giant nut and receive 5 curses has worked perfectly

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: If we do lose this final game, one silver lining is that it means Tillman died for nothing

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: Woweee, Haha, Blaseball fans know what I'm talking about! 🦀👻😂👩🔧🎯 https://t.co/Aj7DTg7p87

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: funny joke. humorus reference. words of encouragement. relevant gif.

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @SamLangellier @blaseball wordplay :. )

renderedContent: @SamLangellier @blaseball wordplay :. )

text: blaseball.boston

username: SamLangellier

displayname: Pun in a Million

username: blaseball

displayname: BLASEBALL COMMISSIONER


rawContent: @blaseball im so tired

renderedContent: @blaseball im so tired

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: it's 2:30am now I gotta stay up another hour I've been awake for 20 hours i just wanna see what ascension is + pass out at this point tbh

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: Birds Please Free Axel in the Final Game For Shits and Giggles

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @bintuwrong @SpyHouston ...you're a genius

text: blaseball.boston

username: YourFriendSar

username: bintuwrong

displayname: Gheorghe Hagi

username: SpyHouston

displayname: Houston Spies


rawContent: @2tot2fox i'm not going back to my neurosurgery job at john hopkins, im in it for the long hall little fox. Claws Up!

text: blaseball.boston

displayname: Tot Fox


rawContent:
1 Crabs win and we find out what ascension is

Will we get stronk?
Will all crabs players be obliterated?
Will we unlock ILB 2: Electric Boogaloo?

No matter what happens, we'll all find out together. CLAWS UP! 🦀👁

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @FlangraphsBlase @GuntherOBrian @CHSSTFans @kyl_armstrong https://t.co/KfFfdiL9rF

text: blaseball.boston

username: BFFBlaseball

username: CHSSTFans

displayname: 👟 Charleston Shoe Thieves 👟

displayname: Kyle Armstrong


rawContent: @2tot2fox claws up tot fox. signed - crabs social media person

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @UtilityPlayerG 🤷♀

renderedContent: @UtilityPlayerG 🤷♀

text: blaseball.boston

username: UtilityPlayerG

displayname: Tony G


rawContent: 2⃣

renderedContent: 2⃣

username: BlaseballCrabs

text: blaseball.boston

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @FinnBc @BlaseballTimes @SpyHouston Catizen Kane finn, come on

text: blaseball.boston

username: FinnBc

displayname: 🦀⚾F I N N👁J A M E S⚾🦀

username: BlaseballTimes


rawContent: 1⃣

renderedContent: 1⃣

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @AxelTrololol @BlaseballTimes @SpyHouston like Lightning McQueen says: "Dethrone Gods! Ka-chow!"

text: blaseball.boston

username: AxelTrololol

displayname: Axel Trololol


rawContent: @AxelTrololol @BlaseballTimes @SpyHouston Disney's Cars frnachise, also good! movie night after these games (if we're all still alive)?

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @BlaseballTimes @SpyHouston love cats! people said the movie was bad but we thought it rocked

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @SpyHouston 1 AND 2 SOUND FUN but 3 is just mean to spies players

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent:
@WTFBSplortRadio is it a small book
or is it a giant hand?
🤔

text: blaseball.boston

username: WTFBSplortRadio

displayname: WTFB Splorts Radio 👁🗨


rawContent: @NoStarsLars1 @thegameband what

renderedContent: @NoStarsLars1 @thegameband what

displayname: The Baltimore Crabs 🦀👁 @ blaseball.com

text: blaseball.boston

displayname: Lars Taylor

username: thegameband

displayname: The Game Band


rawContent: and that's how it all started. when we opened the book https://t.co/Y4sZ3cuyrT

renderedContent: and that's how it all started. when we opened the book twitter.com/SofiaAjram/sta…

text: blaseball.boston

text: twitter.com/SofiaAjram/sta…


rawContent: @CHSSTFans idk sorry, try asking the commish?? :(

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @CHSSTFans you need 3 wins to ascend fyi it's in the book. good luck! 🦀🧡

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: yo @thegameband prep the ascension build

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @HOU_SPI_RAD_TRA gg, crab.

renderedContent: @HOU_SPI_RAD_TRA gg, crab.

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @blaseball say the line commish

renderedContent: @blaseball say the line commish

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent:
TOSSER
BEAN https://t.co/dZO08lOp3g

renderedContent:
TOSSER
BEAN https://t.co/dZO08lOp3g

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: Me at 5am during the 5th game of the final, having not cooked or eaten anything: "wow why am I so drunk and hungry?"

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: Can this plucky underdog team overcome the odds and win the playoffs? Let's find out! https://t.co/yGZLf3smLD

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent:
today is a good day
no thoughts no problems
only free nagomi mcdaniel : )

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @hmouthsunbeams deal 🧡

renderedContent: @hmouthsunbeams deal 🧡

text: blaseball.boston

username: hmouthsunbeams

displayname: Hellmouth Sunbeams


rawContent: @MiamiBlaseball https://t.co/5DyiCeIeM7

text: blaseball.boston

text: xbox.com/en-GB/xbox-gam…

username: miamiblaseball

displayname: Miami Dale


rawContent: @Stevenson_GPA class reference

renderedContent: @Stevenson_GPA class reference

text: blaseball.boston

displayname: GPA_ Stevenson


rawContent: alright birds, the @philly_pies have a birds game next, it's time to free @jesstelephone now! https://t.co/Lp05f2uZGK

text: blaseball.boston

displayname: Philly Pies, falling blaseball player receptacle

username: jesstelephone

displayname: Jessica Telephone


rawContent: @blaseball wow i love birds now!

renderedContent: @blaseball wow i love birds now!

text: blaseball.boston

displayname: BLASEBALL COMMISSIONER


rawContent: this aged poorly

renderedContent: this aged poorly

text: blaseball.boston

rawContent: wow fuck birds

renderedContent: wow fuck birds

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @_stephen_____ sorry, for anyone reading it's absolutely "not" true 😉 (brb increasing my patreon to $69)

text: blaseball.boston

displayname: StephenLs


rawContent: Once again The Game Band show their clear Crabs bias by fixing the birds circling bug and freeing Nagomi in game 1 of the playoffs

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: axel who?

renderedContent: axel who?

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @blaseball : )

renderedContent: @blaseball : )

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: Never stop saying the line, Nagomi https://t.co/tlIixl609C

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @hifridays @NagomiMcdaniel first thing we said after she scored 5 points

text: blaseball.boston

username: hifridays

displayname: Hawaiʻi Fridays

username: NagomiMcdaniel

displayname: NAGOMI MCDANIEL


rawContent: hey @BlaseballT ... https://t.co/78DpjAwW4J

text: blaseball.boston

username: BlaseballT

displayname: blaseball struggle tweets


rawContent:
TILLMAN: so that's it? as soon as I sign on the dotted line, my debt is sealed?
BIRDS: yes. your life will be traded for her freedom
TILLMAN: alright, noice. could you give her a message from me?
BIRDS: that can be arranged
TILLMAN: tell her... she wasn't THAT good anyway......

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: RIP to our playoffs opponents but she's been shelled for literally 3 seasons and she's ready to play. https://t.co/3wu60IcOpM

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: TIME FOR CRAB MOTHERTFUKERSS!!!" https://t.co/bUdn7E9wVB

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: @blaseball https://t.co/vfWLQqwoaG

renderedContent: @blaseball twitter.com/BlaseballCrabs…

text: blaseball.boston

text: twitter.com/BlaseballCrabs…

rawContent: Blaseball isn't a video game, it's a social experiment designed to see what happens when 4 Full Time developers have all of their weekends ruined for the rest of their lives

text: blaseball.boston

username: blaseball


rawContent: How it started vs How it ends https://t.co/wjKLtB6Fd5

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent:
One more championship to ascension

We'll try our best, for Combs. And in spite of Tillman

text: blaseball.boston


rawContent: Solidarity 🦀🙏 @hifridays

renderedContent: Solidarity 🦀🙏 @hifridays

text: blaseball.boston

rawContent: Throwing OLD BAY over my shoulder as I clock out #FridayVibes

username: OLDBAYSeasoning

displayname: OLD BAY

rawDescription: There are only two things you need to know about #OLDBAY Seasoning: 1. it's great on seafood and 2. it's great on everything else. 🦀

location: Maryland

text: oldbay.com


rawContent: @BfWinkler @NoStarsLars1 @SunbeamsBickle @hmouthsunbeams @ChiBlaseball @rallypitcher y'all are good, the main takeaway is The Shape Of Water and Hairspray are both set in Baltimore in the 1970s and many people demand a crossover

text: blaseball.boston

username: BfWinkler

displayname: Nic Winkler

username: ChiBlaseball

displayname: Chicago Firefighters Official Official Account

username: rallypitcher